Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

So, thanks to VAXMan's expertise, we have recently eliminated "marillionfreak" from the Aural Moon community. If you missed his rants, trust me, it was not just deserved, but overdue. However, in shout this evening, the idea came up to NOT ban idiots of this ilk, but to write a script that will substitute a Monty Python quote every time said idiot shouts. *I* personally find this way funnier, so here we go: what are your favorite Python quotes?

Is this the right thread for an argument? (and please do NOT play that skit out in the thread :D )

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

"Go and boil your bottoms, you sons of a silly person." Let the quotes begin. :D

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

"Tis but a scratch" said the black knight after his arms were cut off. From MP and the Holy Grail.

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

Some favs:

"I fart in your general direction."
"I blow my nose at thee!"
"Your mother was a hampster, and your father smelled of elderberries."
"A duck!"
"O Merciful Lord, use this, Thine Holy Hand Grenade, to blow Thine enemies to bits, in Thy mercy."
"This is an ex-parrot!"
"I warn you, it's quite runny!"

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

a few more;

“We are no longer the knights who say ni! We are now the knights who say ekki-ekki-ekki-pitang-zoom-boing!”

“Nudge, nudge, wink, wink. Know what I mean?”

“-She turned me into a newt!
-A newt?
-I got better...”

“Oh! Come and see the violence inherent in the system! Help, help! I'm being repressed!”

“And now for something completely different.”

“Nobody expects the Spanish inquisition!”

“He's not the Messiah - he's a very naughty boy.”

"Brian: Excuse me. Are you the Judean People's Front?
Reg: Fuck off! We're the People's Front of Judea."

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

"My hovercraft is full of eels."

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

No no no, it's spelled, "Raymond Luxury Yacht," but it's pronounced, "Throat Warbler Mangrove"

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

"Every sperm is sacred!"

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

My nipples explode in the light.

-What's on the telly?
-Looks like a penguin

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

Have you any cheddar?

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

from eric the half a bee: "Cyril Connelly?"

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

"My theory, which belongs to me, is mine. All brontosauruses are thin at one end, much, much thicker in the middle, and then thin again at the far end."

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

In order to maintain air-speed velocity, a swallow needs to beat its wings forty-three times every second, right?

I don't want to go on the cart!

We're an anarcho-syndicalist commune. We take it in turns to act as a sort of executive officer for the week,...

Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.

...

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

"an argument is an intellectual process, while contradiction is just the automatic gainsaying of anything the other person says."


no it isn't

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

No, now go away or I shall taunt you a second time.

Every time I try to talk to someone it's "sorry this" and "forgive me that" and "I'm not worthy"...

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

"I'm not dead yet."

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

“Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government!”

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

And now for something completely different.

The Larch.

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

well, someone has to offer this classic: "IT'S!"

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

"Note the huge-breasted typist in the background..."

And remember when Opera did this to Microsoft?

http://www.opera.com/press/releases/2003/02/14/

There may be an archive somewhere - it's hilarious.

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

"VOOM"?!? Mate, this bird wouldn't "voom" if you put four million volts through it! 'E's bleedin' demised!

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

Says it all.8-) :LOL:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGRPFUYUUdQ

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

I'm with The Gooze on that one.

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

I spent two hours today burying a cat. He didn't want to stay in the hole!

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

Damnn - all my favourites already taken.....so how about;

'Penny for an ex-lepper?'

'Only the true messiah would deny that he is the messiah'

'What have the Romans ever done for us......?'

'...and if you tell kids of today that..they won't believe you' (Four Yorkshire men Sketch)

'The Norwegian Blue prefers kipping on it's back'

'If you hadn't nailed it to the perch it'd be pushing up the daisys'

'It's scientific experiments for the lot of you'

'Badger spleen, otter's noses, wolf nipple chips...get 'em while they're hot!!'


(I'd better stop now - but actually one of my all time favourite bits is Spike Milligan's cameo in Life of Brian)

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

"The tenants arrive in the entrance hall here, and are carried along the corridor on a conveyor belt in extreme comfort and past murals depicting Mediterranean scenes, towards the rotating knives. The last twenty feet of the corridor are heavily soundproofed. The blood pours down these chutes and the mangled flesh slurps into these... "

and when they shut him down:

"Yes, well, of course, this is just the sort blinkered philistine pig ignorance I've come to expect from you non-creative garbage. You sit there on your loathsome, spotty behinds squeezing blackheads, not caring a tinker's cuss about the struggling artist. (shouting) You excrement! You lousy hypocritical whining toadies with your lousy colour TV sets and your Tony Jacklin golf clubs and your bleeding masonic handshakes! You wouldn't let me join, would you, you blackballing bastards. Well I wouldn't become a freemason now if you went down on your lousy, stinking, purulent knees and begged me. "

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

"Pointed sticks? Ho, ho, ho. We want to learn how to defend ourselves against pointed sticks, do we? Getting all high and mighty, eh? Fresh fruit not good enough for you eh? Well I'll tell you something my lad. When you're walking home tonight and some great homicidal maniac comes after you with a bunch of loganberries, don't come crying to me!"

Re: Python fans and how to deal with trolls
 

"Intercourse the Penguin!"